Wednesday 15th April, Day 18

Wednesday 15th April, Day 18

The temperature was -23°C and the wind blowing with 15km/h. When we walked north, the wind was really in our faces, but at this stage 15 km/h wind from the east was actually something we were able to cope with. We walked for 15.2 nautical miles.

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Today was a really bad day for me. After waking up, I realized that I had a great day yesterday and now yesterday was gone and I had to do it all over again. Everything I had done yesterday, I had to do again today. There was absolutely no recognition and I had deleted my memory of the day before, all that mattered was today. The easiest way to explain it, is if you have ever seen a movie called “Groundhog Day”. In Groundhog Day the character wakes up every day and has to relive the exact same experiences of the day before. In my version of Groundhog Day, every single day that I live, is the worst day of my life, the worst day that I can remember since yesterday. And every day is the same.

As we walk along we can’t hear very well, what is going on, we can’t see very well what is going on. You can’t really talk to the other team members, as you all follow the same track, meaning you have a lot of time to think about the past, the present and the future. Some of the team members were taking out a lot of their frustrations on me at the time, and it made me think of my brother and I, as I often do the same with him. During the long walk, I had a think about, not just how I treat my brother but also how we treat each other. I had a think about human relationships and how I could become a better person.

Today was also the first day I walked and not skied, which was a lot quicker with the terrain. By the late afternoon we reached an area with very thin ice, so we decided to camp early to avoid any risks.

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